Sitting on my desk is a small plastic chicken. If I wind this chicken up and fill it full of little, plastic gum eggs, it will waddle across my desk, shooting 'eggs' out of its nether regions. The chicken was a gift, handed to me wrapped and topped with a bow, at the beginning of a date five months ago - and it was perfect and still makes me grin when I look at it.

On that date, I met someone who has become my friend, companion, bug-stomper, and partner in crime. He has introduced me to comics and cartoons, soothed my neurotic cat, endured the affections of my non-neurotic cat, and is content to let me play Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic on his Xbox for hours at a time. He makes me laugh, keeps me intrigued, and most of all, makes me happy. And today is his birthday.

Happy Birthday, Keith. I'm so glad I get to celebrate it with you. :)

Well, welcome to the world little miss Zoe! (Though at 10 lbs 7 oz, I hesitate to call you 'little' anything!) Nice of you to finally show up and meet everyone! :)

In but a few hours (or sooner if nature wills it), two very cool friends will be parents to a happy, huge, bouncing baby bump.

It seems like no time has passed since a flurry of e-mails arrived in my inbox last Christmas announcing an upset stomach, a late night chemist trip, and a bit of "Does that look like a 'plus' sign to you?" ponderings. In the time since, I've enjoyed listening in from across an ocean as Lizzie nested, gardened, freaked out one or two times, and never did fork over a picture of what she looks like pregnant. Karl, meanwhile, practiced his parenting skills on assorted marine wildlife. And the cats Gabe and Mali rose up and declared squatters rights on all the baby goods while simultaneously displaying their lack of babysitting skills by killing half the birds in the backyard.

I can't think of two people more wonderful and fantastic and wacky enough to dive right into this whole parenting thing without blinking. I wish there weren't an ocean separating us, because I'd love to be there to help these first few months. And by help, I mean 'hide in the corner and snigger and disappear when it comes time to change diapers'.

Welcome to the world, Bump. Come on out and meet your new parents. If you're even half as great as they are, you're going to be one helluva kid. :)

Sleep. What an amazing concept. I'm not as familiar with it lately as I once was, though.

I used to love sleeping, in part because I have very vivid dreams. Fun dreams. And there's nothing like snuggling up under some big fluffy covers and dozing away with a cat at my feet. Ahhh, bliss.

But lately, I've been so busy and playing crazy catch-up with work, that I'm starting to develop a nice insomnia routine. I go to bed between 11:30 PM and midnight. And then I wake up at 4 AM. And my brain starts whirling and spinning through all the things I need to do, or projects that need attention, or e-mails to write. And once it starts, I can't stop it. Its a constant stream of, "and this.. and that... oh and this... and I forgot that..." and next thing I know, it's time to get ready for work. If I do fall back asleep, it's only a half-sleep and my dreams all revolve around work.

I hate sleeping pills, but I also hate finding myself at my desk, sucking down Diet Dr. Pepper in an effort to keep my eyes open.

How do other people do it? How do you leave work at work, even when work is crazy busy, and turn it off and sleep? Are there other secret remedies I can try? Teas? Meditation? Knocking myself in the head with a brick before bed?

I suppose if I can't figure out something, I'll at least be available for chatting at 4 AM every morning.

Telegram Delivery:

Still very busy.

Stop.

Still very tired.

Stop.

Weekend is soon.

Stop.

Weekend is happiness.

Stop.

Send chocolate.

175 miles. That's roughly how many miles you can put on a car in four days if you keep making little trips here and there for groceries, or to return movies, or to drive around town with the windows down and the sunroof open just because, well, you haven't done that yet. I still adore it, have found nothing I dislike about it, and want to go visit it when I'm trapped inside the office all day.

Speaking of inside the office, I'm drowning under piles of work. Deep pit of work. I hate my inbox. I'm trying to take care of things and there it is, just burping up a new e-mail to deal with every 30 seconds. I keep giving it the evil eye, but it just won't stop. New mail new mail new mail. But don't think I'm really complaining - it's wonderful to be busy and have projects to work on - I'm just exhausted!

I've fallen asleep during three movies in the last 72 hours. Solaris - which could knock out a horse. I kept waiting for it to pick up. A little. Just a little. It never does. On the other hand, you get to see George Clooney's naked ass. So there's that. But believe me when I say you may sleep through it.

Daredevil - better. Fun. Lots of leather. You don't get to see Ben Affleck's naked ass. Still fell asleep a few times out of sheer exhaustion.

The Life of David Gale. I love Kevin Spacey. I really do. But I've seen him play this same character like 5 times now - and you don't get to see his naked ass. I fell asleep a few times, but kept waking up when the movie started beating me over the head with its message. I don't support the death penalty - for the same reasons this movie illustrates. But even I got annoyed with the message being driven home over and over and over again. It was filmed in Austin though, so I got to spot the local scenery.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I think I need to go visit my car.

Meet the newest addition to the household. :)